Sunday, February 8, 2015


Just didn't want you to forget that Thoughts for 100 Sabbath Days can be purchased on Amazon!!

There was a time in my life when I was asked to be the Master of Ceremonies during amateur productions on the stages of Cultural Halls found in the chapels of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in such renowned places as Garden Grove, California; Taylorsville, Utah; Tooele, Utah and Reno, Nevada. It was never a task I sought after and I was never able to totally get comfortable while involved with this chore, enough to get past the increased anxiety which came with such opportunities. There was, therefore, a degree of relief which came into my life, when Kathleen and I returned from serving our mission in Colombia and moved to Mission Viejo, California, where I discovered this part of my past life was gratefully buried somewhere in the wastelands of Nevada.

Lest I fall into that trap of having an introduction which turns out to be longer than the Thought I had intended to share, let me get on with it.

One of my favorite jokes which I liked to share during my very amateur stand up career was entitled ‘The genie of the blue light bulb.’ It was one of those prolonged jokes which even when accompanied with antics and gestures ended with a period of silence and then laughter as the audience recognized what had happened and came to the realization that – oh, yeah – now I get it. I always had to have an uncomfortable pause while I said to myself ‘wait for it’ – burst of laughter – proceed…


There was once a young man who received from his uncle the inheritance of a small corner drug store in a small town.

Those of the current generation would have to go to a movie which took place in the 1950’s or earlier to get a real picture of the type of business corner drugstores were in those days. Upon entering you would see just a few rows which held stuff which was sold in drug stores. (Bandages – Iodex – and a lot of other stuff the computer doesn't even recognize as being real). There would also be a fountain with a counter and stools with no backs which revolved, where you could order such delights as cherry coke and malted milk shakes. My personal favorite, when I went to the corner drug store, was a coke with a squirt of some very sour stuff. At the back of the store was the pharmacy which looked like what we now see in vintage banks as a teller’s window.

Anyway, after relocating his family to the small town where the small corner drug store was found, the young man set about wiping the accumulated dust from the shelves, fountain area and pharmacy. When he had completed his task he set about cleaning the storage room which was behind the pharmacy.

In the storage room there were shelves which lined the walls and went from floor to ceiling. There was a rail with a suspended ladder which could be moved easily to get to the upper shelves. While he was hurriedly cleaning the room, on one of the top shelves he discovered a very large blue light bulb. It was quite a clumsy task to wipe the big blue light bulb and retain his balance. He had just about completed the cleaning of the bulb when it slipped out of his hands and exploded on the storage room floor.

A thin line of dust started to escape from the remains of the big busted blue bulb and continued to grow until it materialized into a gigantic blue genie.

The following conversation ensued between the terrified nephew and the Genie of the Blue light bulb. You have to use your imagination at this point to hear the booming voice of the Genie and the shaky voice of the new drug store proprietor.

Genie: I am the genie of the blub light bulb – you have freed me of my prison – your three wishes are my command!

Nephew: I really don't have any wishes.

Genie: Surely you must have some desire!

Nephew: I have always wanted to go on a vacation.

Genie: Your wish is granted!

Nephew: Who will watch the store?

Genie: I will – you now have one last wish!

So the quivering nephew showed the genie around the store and taught him how to run a drug store business.

Whereupon the genie replied:

Genie: I have it!!

Nephew: In a voice which was even more quivering – sat down at the counter and said – please make me a malted milk shake.

Appropriate pause ………. followed by my envisioning that you now get it and are rolling uncontrollably on the floor.

(To be continued)

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