Sunday, May 8, 2011

YOU MISSED

Long ago when Kathleen and I were still under the responsibility of guiding the teens and preteens who fell under our parental stewardship, through the crazy maze of adolescence, we had many chances for meaningful eternal learning moments. On one of those infrequent special evenings when our entire family happened to be at home, Kathleen was suddenly struck with an overwhelming desire to record the moment for future reference on Polaroid.


Cevin, our eldest son, was entrusted with and dispatched on the errand to retrieve the magical camera from our bedroom. After a short period of time he returned juggling the camera in three parts; front, back and film. My mechanically gifted wife soon reassembled the camera into its original form and then desired to test the reliability of her handiwork.


Our third son, Troy, never known to be camera shy, volunteered to be her model. I have often wondered what might have been going through his mind. Perhaps it was something like, ‘the best chance the camera would have of resurrecting its functions would happen if the lens was concentrated on the best object available.’ After focusing, snapping and waiting the mandatory 60 seconds, Kathleen showed Troy the print which after going through its developing process remained a solid sheet of white. He looked up at his mother with a disgusted frown and with a whine of protest said, “You missed!”


During my life I have always enjoyed reading biographies and autobiographies about people whose lives seemed worthy of being accounted for because of the famous and infamous events of their mortal passage. These readings have included people who governed and those who were governed. They have included people on all levels of the social and educational spectrum. Their contributions have affected few or many. They spent their lives in a cacophony of talents and abilities, but, when they were no longer actively among us, our lives were still being influenced and being made different because they were here.


The one commonality they seemed to have shared was that for at least one other person and many times for innumerable persons, they had contributed in some way to an indelible change on those who fell within the influence of their shadows. When reading these histories during my life, more times than I can bring back to remembrance I paused to wonder why. Why had these made such a difference during mortality, and their names continually whispered in reverence for generations? Many of their contemporaries, will be remembered only as long as the engraved few lines remain on their headstones which will draw many a quizzical glace as future generations search through the unkempt remains of their last earthly home? We would hope that the winds of the decades working upon the engraved words would never change the epitaph so that it would read, “You Missed!”


Lest we immediately view our little corner in the field to be insignificant, and any contribution we might make to be less than dross for humanity, it would be well to contemplate the words of John Ruskin: “The strength and power of any country depend absolutely on the quality of the good men and women in it.” If we view the collective span of humanity dwelling on earth at any one time as a chain, it is easy to envision that each link is ultimately significant to the strength of the entire chain. Each link that does not achieve its potential, hastens the day when the chain becomes weakened and is thereby kept from reaching its intended purpose.


If, by some magical formula, it were made possible for us to stand side by side with our potential selves, most of us would probably be astonished by the gulf we see between what we are and what we have the capacity to be. I wonder as we gazed upon that expanse if the first words to leave our lips would be, “You Missed!” It may be possible that the most damaging limitations we put on our potential is our refusal to see ourselves in the same light our Heavenly Father views us. How often do we look in the mirror and see nothing but dust, while our Beloved Father sees only the specs of gold. How often do we walk along the calm lake’s shore and see reflected an insignificant being walking alone along the edge of the Universe, while He whom we call Father sees a soul readying itself for eternal life.


Generations ago, Herbert Hoover warned, “We are in danger of developing a cult of the common man.” I tremble to think that in some visionary way he was hearing a chorus sing the discordant melody, “We missed!”


It has been well studied and documented that innate talent and intelligence only partially determine the extent of a person’s contribution. As it turns out persistence, desire, direction and dedication are far more important in determining whether we cast a shadow of change or muddle through life in mediocrity adding our unsure ‘I missed,’ note to the choir.


As I go through the daily pull of life am I vigilantly watching that my link remains bright and clear of rust? Am I constantly ridding my small corner of unwanted weeds and nurturing the plants under my care. Have I come to understand and believe that every day, in fact every minute, is adding to the eternal-ness of our lives? When will I at last grasp the fact that our future is being formed in the present, our here and now will in a blink become our past? The seconds of now are such a slippery scene that I must grasp them securely, with a constant remembrance that how this fleeting moment is used is important to the ‘me’ that I am becoming.


Before this moment has escaped our grasp it might be a great time to re-evaluate ourselves in the darkroom of our potential. What am I developing into? Will my life turn out to be a negative? Does the possibility exist that my posterity will view the print of my life and with a disgusted frown, exclaim with a whine of protest, “You Missed?”


One last thought to remember. Heavenly Father has never created a disposable child, but only children who have the potential to become co-heirs with His Son Jesus the Christ.

89 comments:

  1. Brother Riley- so sorry to hear about your mother. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I too face this 6th mothers day being............ motherless. It's a void that no one else can fill and yawns open and painfully sad and empty. I would give anything to sit in my mom's lap or hear her "sweetheart" on the other end of the telephone line. Have a safe and sweet trip.

    Jan Pingree

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  2. Bill: So sorry to hear about you Mother. Have a safe trip, enjoy your time with loved
    ones and thanks for all of your great words of wisdom each week.
    Today's thought sparked a very deep impression on me and I'll share it with you
    when you get back. Travel safely.

    sincerely,

    Clark Smith

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  3. Hola presidente, acabo de leer el mensaje. Gracias por pensar en cada uno de quienes fuimos sus hijos durante la misión y la sabiduría conque nos forjaron a vivir tan maravillosa experiencia.


    Abrazos y siempre también para la hermana Kathleen.

    PATRICIA MONTOYA

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  4. Shawn wrote: "Sorry to hear of your loss. I pray that the Comforter will be with you during this time."

    Shawn White

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  5. Thank you so much for your thoughts today. Very inspirational!

    Shawn White

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  6. "Love you Grandma Nina! "

    Rynn Riley

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  7. "Pte. Lo sentimos muchos nuestras oraciones seran para ustedes.. los amamos!"

    Jose Ganoza Caro

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  8. "Le acompañamos en este momento, reciba un caluroso abrazo. Flia Murillo."

    Clara Valenzuela

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  9. I have loved hearing about your beloved mother over the years. What a wonderful life she has led. God bless you at this wonderful yet very difficult time. See you on the 17th.

    Carolyn Hildt

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  10. "What an amazing woman Aunt Nina was! i feel very blessed to be descended from such a noble family. sending our love and prayers for comfort for your family :) dani"

    Danielle Wootton Lassen

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  11. "Lo siento mucho! queda con ustedes la certeza de volverla a ver y la esperanza de tenerla cerca otra vez."

    Ana Margarita Durango

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  12. "Oh...such a celebration! It always sounded like she lived a full and wonderful life...how could that not be with you as her son!!! She is celebrating right now...it is just so hard for those left behind...love you!!!"

    Debbie Pack Lark

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  13. I'm so sorry to hear about the passing of your mother but I'm happy to know it was peaceful. Selfishly I wish it had been after the 17th.

    Joyce Woolf

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  14. "I am so, so sorry for your loss! Lots of prayers & love to you & your family."

    Christa Jeanne Woodall

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  15. I'm so sorry to hear that. Thanks for letting us know...our love and thoughts are with you.

    xoxo Christine Riley

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  16. Dear Bill,

    Sorry for my poor English, but I want to express my gratitud for your inspired messages.

    Reading your thougts today it came to my mind a vers of the Book of Mormon (Alma 37:5) when he talk to his son Helaman about how the keep and care the plates, and he give him an specific assignment. "...si son conservadas, deben retener su brillo;"... I wondering what Alma try to said his son about it, and today readin your message, I understand better this scrpture.

    Thank you very much, I hope some day we have the opportunnity to meet in person.

    Your friend,

    Carlos Fernandez Reinberg
    Bogota - Colombia

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  17. "El dolor es mitigado con el conocimiento de la verdad, que bendición saber que todo no termina y que podremos vernos mas alla"

    Aixa Zoraida Cañas Gómez

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  18. "Sending our love your way. Aunt Nina will be greatly missed, but I know Grandma Rosa is pleased as can be to be with her sister again! I want to say "ditto!" to everything Dani said. ;)"

    Suzanne Wootton Ellertson

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  19. "My thoughts are with you. Bitter sweet time, for sure! Travel safe."

    Debi Woffinden

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  20. "Pres, sorry for your loss. Safe travels as you celebrate a life who has touched many. I imagine she was a great woman, to have molded and shaped such a fine posterity."

    Michael Christensen

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  21. Dear Bill,
    It is a special privilege for me to participate. I loved her so much and considered her to be very, very special. We were just happy to be in the St. George area where we could visit her often and enjoy her bread-making and fruitcake-making skills and her sharp wit and enjoy her tremendous memory of people and places and events that I am sure I had long since forgotten. She will leave a void in all of our lives but that void will be filled up with the joy of knowing that she has been gathered home to the bosom of her large and loving family. Thank you for inviting me.
    We love you both,
    Marion and Linda Law

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  22. Hello, Uncle Bill William, Just saw the post about our Grandma Riley. I called Elaine and will call Bruce and Kathi next. We are wondering what the plans are for Grandma. We want to attend whatever services that will be. And, when did she pass? I have many fond memories of her. She has always been my Grandma Riley. Love you all, Carol Anne

    Hello, Uncle Bill William, Just saw the post about our Grandma Riley. I called Elaine and will call Bruce and Kathi next. We are wondering what the plans are for Grandma. We want to attend whatever services that will be. And, when did she pass? I have many fond memories of her. She has always been my Grandma Riley. Love you all, Carol Anne

    Carol Anne Barrett Daniels

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  23. I'm so happy for you Mother, my Aunt Nina and last of all of my aunts and uncles. Kind of sad for me. What a great Family Reunion! I was just thinking about her last night.

    I have forwarded your announcement to all of my children, nieces and nephews, Law cousins and Beaves cousins. When I get responses from them, I will forward them to you.

    See you next week.
    Love,
    Sandie Law Johnson

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  24. "Presidente, de verdad lo siento mucho pero sé que el Señor le dará el consuelo que necesita en este momento y la esperanza de encontrarla en la vida eterna. Le mando un gran abrazo y mis mas sinceras oraciones."

    Diana Granada

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  25. So sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family.

    Charlene Daniels

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  26. "So sorry for your loss. I am an orphan and it has not been easy."

    Karen Lee Cox Wright

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  27. Bill:

    I am sorry to hear about your mother's passing. I hope you have a safe trip to Utah and a beautiful service for your mom.

    One of my key employees had surgery last Thursday and I need to cover for her on Monday morning so I won't be able to golf.

    Lloyd Harline

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  28. "Bill - you surely have my love & prayers. Sorry for your loss. I didn't know her but I do know she was blessed to have you for a son."

    Kathy Nebeker Eisenbise

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  29. "Le acompaño en espíritu en este momento tan triste querido Presidente. Espero que el amor del Salvador y su fe en Él les ayuden a sobrellevar su ausencia. Un abrazo fraternal para usted y su familia."

    Yoleida Vergel Chacón

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  30. "PRESIDENTE QUE EL PADRE CELESTIAL LES DE EL CONSUELO Y LA FORTALEZA QUE TANTO ESTAN NECESITANDO EN ESTOS MOMENTOS TAN TRISTES PERO LO BUENO DE TODO ES QUE LAS FAMILIAS SON ETERNAS Y NOS VOLVEREMOS A VER CON NUESTROS SERES TAN QUERIDOS,UN ABRAZO"

    Luz Stella Velasquez

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  31. Brother Bill,

    Sorry to here of your mothers passing. She gave to us, your many examples of love, and charity. Helping to form your great service unto the Lord, through family, church, and education. I known you will miss her, but we who never had the privilege to meet her, will always see in you, her continence.

    Bro. Jim Cummings

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  32. "Sorry to hear about your loss Presidente."

    Sam Webster

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  33. "Mis sentidas condolencias"

    Patricia Lozada Stewart

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  34. "Mis sentidas condolencias"

    Patricia Lozada Stewart

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  35. Dear Bill and Kathy, We want to wish you a safe trip and wonderful experience as you lay you sainted mother to rest. We have enjoyed keeping up with her thru your reports and visits. We hope the funeral and burial are a wonderful uplifting experiece. Our love and regards

    Pat & Dave Farr

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  36. "No matter how expected or accepted, losing our mommy makes our heart cry! You'll miss her every day. Loving thoughts to you with an amen to the magnificent promises of our Savior that bring peace and comfort."

    Barbara Townsend

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  37. Dear Bill, Kathy, and family.
    Sandra called me and told me ofAunt Nina's passing.
    She was one of my favorite Aunts. I'm remembering
    the poem that her father, and our grandfather wrote in the
    early 1900's.
    TIME
    by
    Ernest Albert Law

    In precious moments time is measured out to man
    From birth to death. the span.
    In childhood's mirth and play
    To short the bright and happy day.

    It hastens on when youthful hearts are stirred
    With love unvoiced and unheard
    With silent steps the aged see it flee.
    A gasp, 'tis gone into eternity.


    May you find in all your memories a constant source of comfort.
    And know you will encircle your arms around her for eternity.

    I send my love to all.
    Your cousin,
    Valda Law Prickett

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  38. "She must have been a wonderful woman to have raised such a special son. We'll keep you and your family in our prayers."

    Cheri Janes Scott

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  39. "Many condolences, Bill. My dad told me about your mother's passing when I called him and my mom today. Such a hard loss to deal with."

    Caroleen Nord

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  40. I am saddened to hear about your mother's passing and express to you and Kathleen, and all your family, sympathy and condolences. When our mothers died we felt great sadness and still feel the void they left in our lives, but relief they were free of pain and the burdens of their old age. We look forward to that day of reunion as I know you will also. I know your mother's funeral will be one of celebration of her life and pray you will always have fond memories of her.

    Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend our last class and feel bad about it! I wanted to be there to let you know how much I have appreciated our association through the years and have learned so much from you. Your insights into the principles of the Gospel have opened new thoughts for me and trying to apply them in my life has been enriching. I also wanted to remember that I had been in your first class in Mission Viejo - and your last! For me, the last will have been May 3rd. Sister Crunkleton has promised to pick up the last of your notes for my collection.

    My very best wishes to you in all your future endeavors and life experiences. God bless you always.

    Fondly,
    Joyce Draney

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  41. "From what you have said and what you are, she had to have been an amazing mother! Enjoy this family time."

    Kathleen Cannon Brooks

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  42. "que la paz y la unidad rebosen en sus corazones un abrazo"

    Adriana Edwards

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  43. So sorry, bill, for your loss. Always hard to loose a Mommy. I lost mine 10 years ago and still think about her all the time.

    Best wishes.

    Carolyn Huish

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  44. "Sending love and prayers your way!"

    Pam Beckett Anderson

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  45. Thanks and hugs.
    Before I got married I went to Kathy with a problem- I didn't know how to cook. She made it simple, just learn to cook one dish and do it over and over until it's your speciality. Such sweet and simple words yet I never forgot them. I make a great chicken dinner thanks to my 'ward mom' in 1980.

    Love you both,
    Chris Kelley

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  46. Thank you and Happy Mothers Day to you Kathy....So sorry about your Moms passing...I actually attended my son_in _ laws Grammas funeral yesterday the 6th she was 101 years old....It was held in Ogden and her children spoke so sweetly and tenderly about their Mother! It was a sweet moment to share with my grandchildren (her great grandchildren!)

    My Heavenly Father Bless you!

    Renee Lehman

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  47. "querido presidente de corazon comparto su dolor y sabemos que muy pronto nos encontraremos con todos nuestros seres queridos que an partido primero que nosotros en las duras y pesadas tambien estoy con hustedes les quiero."

    Luis Alfonso Gutierrez Mejia

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  48. "They must need some great moms in Heaven right now. My mom died a little over 2 weeks ago, and I saw that Leanne Anderson's mom died recently too."

    Dana Hart Roper

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  49. Hello Rileys:
    So sorry to hear you lost your mother. God bless you both as you pass through the coming week.
    By the way, this week's THOUGHTS was really great.
    Thanks for sending it, especially under such sad circumstances.

    Sharon Cocanour

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  50. "So sorry Bill. Grandma didn't have a very good sense of timing on this one. She could have had one more mother's day to be honored. Please let us know the details when you can. Elaine has kind of been our link to grandma, but this came as a surprise to her also."

    Bruce Barrett

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  51. "Lo sentimos mucho y le acompañamos, también. perdimos una de nuestra madres en la flia."

    Luz Marina Pinzon Calderon

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  52. "My sincere condolences for your loss."

    Ilda Miranda

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  53. So sorry to hear about your mom's passing Bill-although I know she was ready to go I also know she will be missed.

    Wendy Bartholomew

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  54. We thank you for letting us know about Nina. Our condolences go to all the family. Nina was special to us.
    Please let us know when the funeral will be we would like to be there.


    Bonnie & Delwin Thomson

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  55. "LO SIENTO MUCHO,"

    Martha Ujueta Másmela

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  56. Bill and Kathy,

    Thank you for calling this morning to let us know about Grandma. She has been such a great example and positive, loving influence in so many lives for so many years and has left a wonderful legacy of faithfulness and true charity.

    We realize you and Kathy have many things to prepare during the next couple of days, if there is anything Aaron, Tyra, or Kathie and I can do to help please allow us to. It would be a pleasure to be able serve in some way.

    Warmest regards,
    Dan and Kathie Johnson

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  57. mil gracias por dar un poco de usted...me gusto mucho este pensamiento..

    yolanda maria florez corrales

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  58. "Dear President
    Mi sentido de condolencia y que el Creador les consuele a ustedes con su santo Espiritu en esos momentos dificiles.
    Nosotros aqui en Colombia oraremos por ustedes."

    Victor Manuel Holguin Montaño

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  59. "You are in my thoughts and prayers!"

    Jacinthe Mitchell

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  60. "Mi mas sentido pesame, que el Señor le de la fortaleza y la paz que el solo puede darnos y lo mas hermoso es que algun dia nos encontraremos con las personas que amamos, es una promesa de que las familias son eternas. R.I.P. SISTER"

    Bibiana Velasquez

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  61. "Presidente cuanto lo siento, ese es un dolor muy grande yo perdí a la mia hace un año y solo Nuestro Padre Celestial me ha dado paz en mi corazón, lo quiero mucho presidente"!!!!"

    Vicky Milena Donado Choles

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  62. Dear Bill:

    Sorry to hear of the passing of your Mother. Apparently, she lived a long, faithful and productive life.

    Don’t worry about the Temple assignment. I will take care of everything.

    Bryant Rossiter

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  63. Thank you for sending this on to us. We all loved Aunt Nina, and are grateful she is able to be with so many of her loved ones, and she certainly has been a joy and example to us all.

    Love,Berna and Sheldon Law

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  64. Thank you so much for letting me know. She has lived a long life. I am sure she will be greatly missed.

    Karma

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  65. Happy Mothers day Kathy.....we were so sorry to year about mother. Our prayers and thoughts go with you as does our love for both of you...

    Rosemary Mitchell

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  66. Dear Brother Riley,

    Please accept our condolences for the passing of your dear mother. Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this time.

    We really appreciate the thoughtful and insightful messages each week. Thank you for sharing and for your efforts.

    Sincerely,

    Janis and Jennifer Cilderman

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  67. "Keeping good thoughts for you and your family."

    Colleen Janes

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  68. "Our aloha to your family and to Grandma Nina as she reunites with her loved ones."

    Brent Chowen

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  69. Hi Bill and Kathleen: We send our Condolences and Love to your family. Thank you for remembering
    us on this day of sorrow for you and your family but day of love and joy for your Mom and Dad. They
    are dancing today…..The Gospel is True. Happy Mother’s Day to your Mom and Kathleen.

    We love you, Bill and Sharron Ruffner

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  70. "SILENCIO

    Cuando tú te quedes muda,
    cuando yo me quede ciego,
    nos quedarán las manos
    y el silencio.

    Cuando tú te pongas vieja,
    cuando yo me ponga viejo,
    nos quedarán los labios
    y el silencio.

    Cuando tú te quedes muerta,
    cuando yo me quede muerto,
    tendrán que enterrarnos juntos
    y en silencio;

    y cuando tú resucites,
    cuando yo viva de nuevo,
    nos volveremos a amar
    en silencio;

    y cuando todo se acabe
    por siempre en el universo,
    será un silencio de amor
    el silencio.
    (Poesía de Andrés Eloy Blanco a su madre)"

    Diana Granada

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  71. "I'm happy today for Grandma Riley. I am sure she has had a great reunion with her children that passed before her. She was a wonderful wife and mother.

    Kathi Barrett Wright

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  72. Dear Brother and Sister Riley:

    Sorry to hear your mom has passed on. May the Lord comforts and blesses you and your family. You and your family will be in my prayers. See you at our last class.

    Love always,
    Daisy Ryan

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  73. Thank you so much for the funeral information, Uncle Bill. What a great example of living the gospel your mother has been.

    We look forward to seeing you on Wednesday.

    Sharyn Riley

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  74. I was very sorry to hear about the passing of your mother. I will try to get us a tee time on the 16th at San Clemente Municipal.

    Paxton Lockhart

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  75. "Mi mas sentido pesame, Pte."

    Herlin Vasquez Vargas

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  76. "mis mas sentidas condolencias, presi."

    Miguel Vizcardo

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  77. We are so sorry for your loss. Our thoughts are with you and your family,

    Roy and Erma Ward

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  78. Hi Bill,
    We were at the graveside service today. It was so lovely. Your Mother was such a lovely person. She will be so missed. You are in our thoughts and prayers.

    Here are the uncut videos we took today.

    Love you, Sidne and Leonard O'Reilly --

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  79. "Mi sentido pésame Presidente"

    Sergio Andrés Patiño Guiral

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  80. "Presidente que pena pero animo lo mas importante es que podemos reunirnos por siempre otra vez y lo mas hermoso es que usted dirfruto a lado de ellla las madres son lo maximo y tan solo quedan esos hermosos recuerdos . Pero ánimo si"

    Manuel Carvajal Tomalà

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  81. "Querido y recordado presidente se por lo que esta pasando y le acompaño en su sentimientos." "Y los más importante es que algún día nos volveremos a reunir y es parte del plan de salvación." "un abrazo y mucho ánimo presidente y familia"

    Luis Contreras

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  82. "Hay momentos en la vida en que el tiempo se detiene para dar paso la eternidad. Es parte del plan. Abrazos"

    Gloria Patricia Montoya Correa

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  83. "Pte:Acompañandolo en este momento de dolor, pero sabemos que es parte del plan de Dios.La gran esperanza, que las familias son para siempre."

    Gonzalo Devia Oviedo

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  84. "Un gran abraso a la distancia, le acompaño en su dolor."

    Juan Antonio Gonzalez

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  85. Querido Presidente:

    Reciba mis condolencias y un abrazo en estos momentos y siempre.

    Fanny Esperanza Vega Stewart

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  86. Sympathy Wishes
    We're glad your mom was able to live an eventful life. Just think of all the changes she's seen in her lifetime! Our thoughts and prayers are with all of you.

    Barbara Lee

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  87. Hola hermanos Riley! Como estan?

    Gracias por sus mensajes, les aprecio y les recuerdo.

    Con amor.
    Helena Aguirre.

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  88. Siento mucho lo de tu madre. Que triste, es la muerte!
    Y eso que sabemos que van a un buen sitio, pero la separacion es tenaz, si o que?A si estuvimos con la muerte de Arturito mi sobrino, el niño de mi hermano. Nos dio muy duro!
    Que Dios te bendiga a ti y a tu familia!Y que no esten muy tristes.
    Gracias por tus mensajes son muy inspirados!

    Tu amiga.
    Angela Maria Stuart Chaparro.

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