DESTRUCTION AND CONSTRUCTION

During my years of teaching in the Church Education System of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I was also blessed with being involved with the development and construction of three different buildings. The first of those was a new seminary building adjacent to Tooele High School in Tooele, Utah. The second, was a new Institute building which served the students and young adults of the Reno, Nevada area. The third, for which I was only able to be involved in the long preliminary processes, eventually led to the construction of the Institute building adjacent to Saddleback College in Mission Viejo, California.

Although each of these buildings has a history and provides me with many memories, both of the pleasant and not so pleasant kind, it is a remembrance which came because of my involvement at the Reno Institute, during destruction or the ‘old’ building and the construction of the ‘new’ building, that became a springboard for this week’s Thought.

During the adventure of the demolition of the old building, which was rapidly falling apart on its own, and the construction of the new building, we held our classes and had our offices in a house which previously had served to house women who belonged to the LDS sorority attached to the University of Nevada. Memories of our yearlong adventure in that house, as the old building was destroyed and the construction of the new facility took place, seem to fall in the unpleasant memory category. However, now that I pause and search my memories more carefully, there were a lot of great times created by the uniqueness of the situation… I digress… Memories seem to have a way of causing the mind to wander.

I don't know the percentage of my time that year that was taken up as a sidewalk superintendent, but I am sure that it was on an equal par with the time I spent doing the CES work I was actually under contract to do. I watched as the old building quickly became rubble and then almost immediately all traces of its existence were only to be found in old photograph albums and the memories of students who are rapidly becoming numbered among those who we refer to as ‘no longer being among us.’

As rapidly as the old had been taken away the days of construction of the new building were underway. Although it was always on the schedule which was contractually agreed too, the work seemed to drag and stretch as the new edifice ever so slowly rose upon the dust of the old, as we tried to conduct classes and enjoy activities in very cramped conditions.

At last, we finally received the keys from the contractor, the building was dedicated, the remnants of the refreshments from the open house were all cleared, and then it started. It didn't come as an avalanche on the first day people entered our beautiful new facility, but as the weeks passed during the entire length of that inaugural year in the new building. Many of those who came through to attend classes or just to see what all the fuss was about, rather than commenting on the wonders and expansiveness of the new building, wandered the halls bemoaning the loss of the quaintness of that which had been destroyed. The beloved physical evidence which could easily stimulate the memories of courtships, spiritual awakenings, learnings and joyful days and evenings was gone forever.

I tried to have empathy with their sadness, but it was hard for me while having the joy of being able to teach in a modern classroom and prepare in a wonderful office to have empathy with their loss. In fact, their words often made me wonder why they couldn't at least try to share a little bit in the happiness which filled my life.

I was often surprised at my reaction and the dramatic change of mood I would experience when just a few words contrary to my personal view exploded on my reverie.

Likewise:

Many times as I watched our children at play, I marveled at how just a few unkind words or a single thoughtless act turned an entire afternoon of enjoyment into bitterness and anger.

Sadly, we have witnessed the reputation of entire families and organizations changed forever by the thoughtless actions or words of one person.

How often have we seen the divulging of a sacred confidence or the failure to fulfill a verbal agreement wreak havoc with friendships which were forged over decades.

We marvel that trust built up over long years of faithfulness can be shattered with but a small lie or a single moment of thoughtlessness.

It almost seems to be a universal truth:

It exists with buildings.

It exists with individuals.

It exists with groups.

It takes long hours, days and decades of love and effort to build beautiful buildings, bond relationships and bring communal gatherings into fruition, but only seconds of misguided actions or words can cause them to crumble and sometimes never exist again.

Does cleverness really justify unkindness?

Does being right really justify deflating another?

Does existence of a wonderful memory really justify the dampening of the eminent excitement another might presently be enjoying.

Just thinking that perhaps the next time I am about to do or say something unkind, ugly or unnecessary, that I take a breath, hesitate a moment and contemplate how long, if ever, it will take to re-build this relationship I am about to disintegrate with this wrecking ball leaving my mouth.