DESIRES OF LOVING PARENTS

For behold, it came to pass that the Lord spake unto my father, yea, even in a dream, and said unto him: Blessed art thou Lehi, because of the things which thou hast done; and because thou hast been faithful and declared unto this people the things which I commanded thee, behold, they seek to take away thy life.

And it came to pass that the Lord commanded my father, even in a dream, that he should take his family and depart into the wilderness. And it came to pass that he was obedient unto the word of the Lord, wherefore he did as the Lord commanded him. And it came to pass that he departed into the wilderness. And he left his house, and the land of his inheritance, and his gold, and his silver, and his precious things, and took nothing with him, save it were his family, and provisions, and tents, and departed into the wilderness.

And he came down by the borders near the shore of the Red Sea; and he traveled in the wilderness in the borders which are nearer the Red Sea; and he did travel in the wilderness with his family, which consisted of my mother, Sariah, and my elder brothers, who were Laman, Lemuel, and Sam. And it came to pass that when he had traveled three days in the wilderness, he pitched his tent in a valley by the side of a river of water. And it came to pass that he built an altar of stones, and made an offering unto the Lord, and gave thanks unto the Lord our God.

And it came to pass that he called the name of the river, Laman, and it emptied into the Red Sea; and the valley was in the borders near the mouth thereof.

And when my father saw that the waters of the river emptied into the fountain of the Red Sea, he spake unto Laman, saying: O that thou mightest be like unto this river, continually running into the fountain of all righteousness! And he also spake unto Lemuel: O that thou mightest be like unto this valley, firm and steadfast, and immovable in keeping the commandments of the Lord!

Now this he spake because of the stiffneckedness of Laman and Lemuel; for behold they did murmur in many things against their father, because he was a visionary man, and had led them out of the land of Jerusalem, to leave the land of their inheritance, and their gold, and their silver, and their precious things, to perish in the wilderness. And this they said he had done because of the foolish imaginations of his heart. And thus Laman and Lemuel, being the eldest, did murmur against their father. And they did murmur because they knew not the dealings of that God who had created them. Neither did they believe that Jerusalem, that great city, could be destroyed according to the words of the prophets. And they were like unto the Jews who were at Jerusalem, who sought to take away the life of my father.

And it came to pass that my father did speak unto them in the valley of Lemuel, with power, being filled with the Spirit, until their frames did shake before him. And he did confound them, that they durst not utter against him; wherefore, they did as he commanded them. (1 Nephi 2: 1-14)

Even after having gone through the learning stewardship of parenting five sons and a daughter with Kathleen, while the number abiding under our roof shifted between two and eight, it still causes me to wonder when I read the account above.

It clearly states that Lehi was filled with the Holy Spirit during this exchange. Yet, there seems a vast disconnect between the desires he has for his two oldest sons, Laman and Lemuel and the reality he has about who they are and the wrong choices they continually make.

This same disconnect seems to be a pattern starting with father Adam, whose blessing to Cain seems to be out of line with the choices his eldest son makes. I have even wondered about Heavenly Father bestowing the name of Lucifer or Son of the Morning upon his son who became the author of all lies, even Satan.

Some of the wonderings which have passed through my mind are:

Are parents supposed to let eternal hope and desire reign over current reality during their tenured stewardships?

When the Holy Spirit has revealed the eternal nature of a child to parents are they to relate to the child ‘as if’ the child was manifesting those eternal characteristics, even while struggling in darkness?

When the Holy Spirit has revealed the eternal nature of a child to parents when does is it appropriate to explain this to a wayward child?

When is it appropriate for parents to withdraw and refrain from commenting and allow their child to suffer the consequences of their own decisions?

When the deportment of a child negatively impacts a sibling, what is the appropriate reaction of parents?

When a child completely extricates themselves from the beliefs a parent knows to be true, what is the appropriate reaction of parents?

How are parents supposed to react when they have come to know the corrective changes their children make will turn out to be but momentary pauses in known patterns of wrong choices?

Why does agency include the right of all children to know or not to know the reality of the existence of God?

As our connected posterity hastens toward the inclusion of fifty souls, I personally find myself grateful for the existence of an eternity of time where the mystery of parenting might become less cloudy and I will at last see more clearly.

This mystery of mastering parenting gives me one more reason to marvel at the majesty of our Heavenly Parents, who, if I understand their roles correctly, perfectly handle these parenting situations millions of times daily.

Although I clearly understand that this Thought leaves us with zero solutions to the queries presented, I am sure that the pondering of them will cause us all to have a great deal to think about. I have found this dilemma to be true of many passages of scripture. If we really search and ponder them, we are often left with more questions than answers.


THOUGHTS FOR A SABBATH DAY – WILLIAM L. RILEY

EDITED BY – KATHLEEN W. RILEY