UNITED-NESS

Not too long ago I was listening to someone spinning on the principle of “united.” Neither the person nor the topic is really relevant to what I am going to write about. While I was listening my mind started to wander, as it often does when mumbling from any particular quarter drones on and on. Anyway I started to think of the small changes which are needed to change the positive word United to something negative and even at time destructive.

United with a K inserted becomes Un-Knitted = frayed, unraveled, loosened etc.

United when the U is exchanged by IG become IG-nited = lighted, fired, explosive etc.

Adding the preface Dis to United and it becomes Disunited = dissolved, severed, alienated etc.

As the droning continued my mind shifted to the small things which cause so many of the social units of our lives to become, frayed, unraveled, loosened, lit and fired until they become explosive.

I start by addressing the small changes in the smallest of social units, ME. Over and over in my life it has most frequently been just a little loosening of personal standards which have resulted in the unraveling of best intentioned resolutions. Seldom have I made major leaps into destructive patterns, but the un-knitting of one little knot, which leads to the loosening of another, has caused the fraying of my life. If I tarry too long in my awakening, before long the fabric of my life becomes so tattered that repair can be so overwhelming and I may give up the challenge entirely.

Families do not become dysfunctional because they one day wake up in the morning and explode into disarray. The fuse was lit, stomped on, lit again over the years until finally one by one the members of the family no longer have the strength or the will to continue stomping and the fuse speeds like wildfire toward its determined destination. Sadly, somewhere along the line stomping out the lit fuse was replaced by fanning of the flame, as one by one members of the family lost hope of being a united unit.

Cities, counties and nations historically have brought downfall and destruction upon themselves as they allowed differences to cause alienation which led to the eventual severing of civil processes until those values which once caused them to work toward goals of common good were completely dissolved. It is sad to watch as those who should be leaders practice a destructive form of one-up-man ship. As vigorously they spew forth one bitter negative blast after another, trying to convince all who will listen about the incompetence of those, of an opposing view, who proclaim to be also working for the right solutions. The pettiness continues until civility is replaced by arrogance and the spiral steepens until union is dissolved.

I suspect some tailor in the long ago first said it, but I heard it from my mother. It seems to be fitting in the fixing of my personal life as I see the very first knot unravel. It seems to be true with families when the first unkind remark is made. It should be true with those who govern. “A stitch in time saves nine.” When comprehension finally dawned on me what she was saying I understood that the sooner I fixed things in my life the easier they would be to fix. I can’t help but think that this same principle must be true of families and nations. The sooner cessation of any negativity which could lead toward destruction and dissolution is initiated, the easier the task of reunification will be.

I long ago accepted my personal imperfection, but that admission did not relieve me from the responsibility to continue in the attempt to be better today than I was yesterday.

It is understood that all family units will have discord, but it would be well if all members of those units would strive to pour soothing waters while the flames are still small.

Political views should be debated, but never by abandoning civility and truth and always by diminishing the need to find individual prestige and power.

Like so many of the things which my mind wanders through, the principle of United-ness must begin with me!